Monday, December 2, 2019

Invisible

Sometimes I feel invisible. Not just my illness, but myself. I could spend hours doing dishes and laundry and picking up toys, and 30 minutes later the toddler tornado has me back at square one.

I'll admit, I have a bad habit of putting things down wherever I am, and not where they belong, and this contributes to the mess. I'm working on that.


I'm aware that the problem exists, and that's the first step down the path to a solution.

This week is Crohns and Colitis Awareness Week, and I've been sharing my personal IBD story on Facebook and Instagram. It takes courage to #EscapeTheStall and talk about my symptoms (mostly diarrhea and urgency), and I'm practicing being brave, standing up and speaking out, with each day that passes.

It took me a long time to get diagnosed. My mom advocated for me, and even at age 15, when I'd much rather have buried my nose in books, I advocated for myself. I had no choice. The pediatrician couldn't figure it out, my mom's family doctor couldn't either, and when I AGAIN insisted that I did NOT have an eating disorder, I went to a GI specialist and they said Crohn's Disease almost immediately. Most people my age haven't even thought about a colonoscopy, but I'm already a pro.

 (Pro Tips: Chill it, and Don't drink water in advance so that when its time to start you're REALLY thirsty)

How can a medicine that's used to treat diarrhea have the side effect of diarrhea?! All jokes aside, I've been on all kinds of meds over the past 15 years, and have my fingers crossed that more options are found before I need them. 

Surgery was really scary, but the pain relief made it 10,000% worth it.


Even in "remission" I have symptoms. Lucky for me, I'm so used to them that I've nearly forgotten what it feels like to be healthy. 

My journey isn't over, but that doesn't mean that I can't share my story. 

#IBDVISIBLE